Self-Confidence – A Perspective

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Ok, so this blog is supposed to be about Self-Confidence. But what exactly do we mean by that? What comes to Your mind when You hear the term? What does a self-confident person look like or act like? Is it an overall term or can You isolate it depending on the respective context?

If You don’t consider Yourself self-confident on what basis do You get that feeling? Is it even a feeling or maybe just thoughts that are interpreting Your feelings?

You see, just by asking different questions You can look at Self-Confidence from many different perspectives. What’s Your perspective or to repeat the question again: Why do You feel less self-confident? I assume that You do and imply that that’s the reason You came to this blog. If not You might still find it interesting to consider those thoughts…

Possible Definitions

If You look up the term Self-Confidence in a dictionary, You may find a definition like this:

A feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgement

Well then, let’s have a closer look. Self-Confidence is defined as a feeling of trust in Your abilities. Although trust and confidence have almost the same meaning there still seems to be a slight but yet important difference when it comes to detail. While confidence comes close to knowing what the outcome may be based on prior experience and eventual knowledge of facts, trust may be defined as ‘Firm belief in the reliability, truth, or ability of someone or something’ or ‘Acceptance of the truth of a statement without evidence or investigation’. So confidence implies a higher level of certainty whereas trust may actually be based on pure belief. Confidence may also include control while trust puts You in a more vulnerable situation.

Since Self-Confidence is made up of the words Self and Confidence, we should also have a look at each term separately:

Self One’s particular nature or personality; the qualities that make one individual or unique
Confidence The feeling or belief that one can have faith in or rely on someone or something
The state of feeling certain about the truth of something
A feeling of self-assurance arising from an appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities

 

Self

What makes up our ‘Self’? According to the definition it’s our uniqueness but what are these qualities that make us individual and/or unique? What’s exactly meant by particular nature or personality? As we can see, it’s actually very difficult to define and maybe we’ll never get down to one clear definition. So for now, let’s agree on ‘Self’ as the ideas, perceptions, and values we identify with. It’s our consciousness about who we are as a person, about what we can and possibly could do, how we define ourselves and our possibilities. Here are some of the qualities that make up Your ‘Self’:

  • Your body and look
  • Your values and principles
  • Your memories and experiences
  • Your feelings
  • Your talents
  • Knowledge
  • Skills
  • Competence
  • Your perception what others may think of You
  • Your ideal image about Yourself, who and how You would like to be

Our ‘Self’ also includes our self-image which is merely an imagination we have of ourselves and doesn’t necessarily reflect reality. Whatever reality might be since it’s also hard to define as we can only agree on what our mutual idea of reality is. In the end it’s also constructed by each individual by and for themselves based on their perception and experience. I just want to make clear that Your self-image is just that: an IMAGE You have of Yourself. The moment You realize this fact You took another big step towards higher Self-Confidence because now You’re in charge. You can now start to actively modify that image of Yourself in Your own best interest! J

Confidence

Now let’s get to the other part that makes up Self-Confidence which is Confidence. If I translated Self-Confidence from German to English by the exact words it would be Self-Consciousness. I think that this gives us another possible way of getting closer to the term. You’ll probably agree that Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem are to a certain extent interchangeable although there may be differences in detail. Those differences may become clearer by bringing in consciousness. So Self-Confidence includes becoming conscious about ourselves, our abilities, and the qualities we got to know under ‘Self’. Out of this consciousness we then build trust in our abilities which ultimately leads to Self-Confidence.

Self-Confidence Vs. Self-Esteem

Since I mentioned the term I just want to state my opinion about possible differences. I might have called this blog ‘Get Started Self-Esteem’ as well. Basically I find both terms interchangeable. There is a difference however in the way that Self-Esteem requires Self-Confidence because the latter includes the consciousness part. Self-Esteem in my understanding basically describes the feeling of worthiness, that You feel worthy regardless of what others say. By becoming consciously aware of Your own abilities and qualities you build the basis for Self-Esteem through Self-Confidence.

I hope I could make this point clear somehow. My intention with this blog is to share my experience and knowledge I gained so far to help You grow Your Self-Confidence which should also increase Your Self-Esteem…

 

Your turn 🙂

What does Self-Confidence mean to You? Do You have another approach that may be interesting to discuss? Please let us (me and other readers) know what You think and share a comment below. Thank You!

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